say hi to the queen of awkwardness and making life difficult for people

In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.

So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.

the LORD God formed the man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being.

Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the LORD God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the LORD God among the trees of the garden. But the LORD God called to the man, "Where are you?" 

Then the LORD God said to the woman, "What is this you have done?" The woman said, "The serpent deceived me, and I ate."

remember the first sin that entered the world? it wasn't murder, it wasn't theft, it wasn't drug abuse or sexual immorality. adam and eve ate from the tree of knowledge of good and evil when they were told by God not to do so. EATING IS A SIN?!?!? come on... it's no big deal.. they only ATE A FRUIT!! no harm done! let's look at the consequences of their 'sin'.. 

So the LORD God said to the serpent, "Because you have done this,
       "Cursed are you above all the livestock
       and all the wild animals!
       You will crawl on your belly
       and you will eat dust
       all the days of your life.
And I will put enmity
       between you and the woman,
       and between your offspring and hers;
       he will crush your head,
       and you will strike his heel."
To the woman he said,
       "I will greatly increase your pains in childbearing;
       with pain you will give birth to children.
       Your desire will be for your husband,
       and he will rule over you."
To Adam he said, "Because you listened to your wife and ate from the tree about which I commanded you, 'You must not eat of it,'
       "Cursed is the ground because of you;
       through painful toil you will eat of it
       all the days of your life.
It will produce thorns and thistles for you,
       and you will eat the plants of the field.
By the sweat of your brow
       you will eat your food
       until you return to the ground,
       since from it you were taken;
       for dust you are
       and to dust you will return."

And the LORD God said, "The man has now become like one of us, knowing good and evil. He must not be allowed to reach out his hand and take also from the tree of life and eat, and live forever." So the LORD God banished him from the Garden of Eden to work the ground from which he had been taken. After he drove the man out, he placed on the east side of the Garden of Eden cherubim and a flaming sword flashing back and forth to guard the way to the tree of life.

all these because of a bite from a fruit? am i missing something here? yes.. ! im missing the main point! which is plain disobedience to God.  while sin has evolved into all shapes and sizes - stealing, lying, killing, evil thoughts, lustful thoughts, betraying etc. etc., so have our perception of sin. we think that sin is causing harm to another person.. but God calls us to obey. that's His standard, that's where He draws the line. that's how He defines sin, and that's where all of us have failed so terribly. i think of my intentions to cause harm, my lies, my rudeness, lazyness, piracy to "save money" (in actual fact, it's just reluctance to spend when there's the free illegal way out), half heartedness, worrying etc.  and am confident that i have definitely missed God's mark. i'm pretty sure i also ate many times when told not to.. 

so if the consequences of eating a fruit is so big... what more, a murder? but God's mathematics is different from ours. any act of disobedience breaks His heart the same way. like markings on a piece of paper, whether it's just one small teeny weeny mark, or a line, or many small marks, or a fully scribbled on page, it is not a pure white page. the consequences are no different for all those pieces of paper. we lose our relationship with God and eternal life with Him... because we are not pure white pages, we have missed God's perfect standard. we are SINNERS and in Romans 6:23 it says that the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. we sin, we disobey, but GOD STILL GIVES GIFTS?!?! IS HE GENEROUS OR WHATT!!! look what He did after Adam and Eve sinned against him:

The LORD God made garments of skin for Adam and his wife and clothed them.
back to my point on God's generosity and gifts... do you know that Jesus bore the consequences of our sins?!! He=GOD=sin-free=pure white piece of paper, receiving the punishment for the lies we told, the people that we have cursed...our messy marred paper was covered by his pure white paper in the eyes of God. our sins forgiven, our relationship with God restored, eternal life..

it's a gift. but in order to get a gift, one has to receive and accept the gift.. 
and the choice is yours (:

if i had a personality disorder, it would be borderline personality disorder, aka emotionally unstable disorder.. but after reading it...don't you just call this life? plus PMS??

geri and i chose this song for our pretend wedding when we were kids.. wishing & hoping
. teeheehee. i say a little prayer for you was playing on the radio while i was driving home. ah. oldiess ((:

and so after the longest time, it dawned on me that geri and sean aren't gonna be here for much longer either ):

it will be a lifechanging time of my life. hahaha. ): i don't really know how to express my feelings.. but i suppose i need to apologise for being a pain in the butt.. especially when i become lazy and dont do the dishes/cook/clean the house, make too much noise on the piano/guitar, for being bitter and emphasizing what a good job i perform as a lamp post..for being grumpy at dinnertimes.. i hope i havent made life too difficult for you two hehehe. but it has been such a great time and i regret not cherishing that much the times we have had tgt until i realise that it's almost finishing.. THANK GOD WE ARE FAMILY AND RELATED HEHEHE cousin and FCIL WOOOWEEEWOOWEEWOOO CNY!!!
God bless you (: MANY HUGSSSSSSSSSSSS!

IS "NO" LIKE A TABOO WORD IN YOUR DICTIONARY THAT YOU HAVE TO HAVE TO HAVE TO SAY "YES" TO EVERYTHING!?!?!?! GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

http://theresurgence.com/

We have a theology of work but no theology of leisure. We don’t know how to relax and totally disengage; feeling guilty when we do so. We live our lives without margin and fill each day with little room for Sabbath or divine interruptions.
In a recent article in the NY Times, Paul Vitello addresses an issue that is well known: pastor burnout. There is no disagreement as to the problem, but varying ideas on the solution. Paul Vitello’s main solution is taking more vacation time; and certainly all the time we have coming to us.
Time off would undoubtedly help, but there are deeper issues involved:

We have put ministry and service where Jesus belongs.

We get our identity and value in what we accomplish in our work (the number of people we serve, the number of things we are responsible for, the number of things we get done) and not from who we are in Jesus. This is a huge and significant issue that no amount of vacation is going to solve. Longevity and health in ministry will be a result of who you are in Jesus, more than what you do for Jesus. 1 John 5:21 warns us about idols. Ministry can and has become an idol for a lot of us

We see Sabbath as a day or time frame rather than a heart attitude.

We need to practice Sabbath by intentionally engaging and intentionally disengaging through the Holy Spirit’s promptings.

Resting Isn’t Selfish

In Leaders Who Last, I devote a chapter, titled "Pacing," to these issues. Here is a statement from a local newspaper in the chapter:

In the relentless busyness of modern life, we have lost the rhythm between action and rest. There is a universal refrain: I am so busy. As it all piles endlessly upon itself, the whole experience of being alive begins to melt into one enormous obligation. Sabbath time is a revolutionary challenge to the violence of overwork. Many of us, in our desperate drive to be successful and care for our many responsibilities, feel terrible guilt when we take time to rest.

4 Ways to Keep From Burning Out

What is the solution to exhausted and burned-out pastors as well as other leaders giving lots of time to ministry?

1. Confess making an idol of work and find your identity and worth in Jesus and him alone
2. Practice Sabbath on a daily basis, taking short breaks as needed. Don’t kill yourself at work day after day and then pray for a vacation to save you
3. Learn how to say no to some of the needs, demands, and people that come to your attention. You can be concerned without being responsible. Say no to a lot of things so you can say yes to a few things. Say yes to less!
4. Develop other leaders to carry the burden with you (Numbers 11:17).
   
   

Most people in ministry try to do too much and travel too fast. Believe it or not, you are dispensable. Only Jesus is indispensable.

for the first time in a long time, MY DESK LOOKS PRETTY DECENT AND NEAT AND DUST FREE AND CLUTTER FREE! bet no one's as excited as me to start on my assignment now. muahahahaha.

was doing my random round of phantom bloghopping again and saw someone say something on the blog and it was something that was in my prayers and ocf's too and and and AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!
what can i say?
Jesus is too wonderful that He makes me speechless and in awe.
an encouragement to you if you happen to be reading this, God IS listening to your prayers. He is faithful, unchanging, unfailing, and very much ALIVE, greater than we can imagine, yet never fails to be concerned about us little ones.
Each child is special and precious in His sight, despite our imperfections, meanness, cruelness, selfishness, our attempts to push Him out of our lives, His love overcomes all.(Romans 8:38-39   ³⁸For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, ³⁹neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.) and He welcomes us into His loving arms again, like the prodigal son returning to his loving father.. (: God does not give up!

(: (: (:

John 17

Jesus Prays for All Believers

 ²⁰"My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, ²¹that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me. ²²I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one: ²³I in them and you in me. May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me. ²⁴"Father, I want those you have given me to be with me where I am, and to see my glory, the glory you have given me because you loved me before the creation of the world. ²⁵"Righteous Father, though the world does not know you, I know you, and they know that you have sent me. ²⁶I have made you known to them, and will continue to make you known in order that the love you have for me may be in them and that I myself may be in them."

heeheeheeheeheeheeheee

woohooooo *JUMPS FOR JOY*

Who am I?
That the Lord of all the earth,
Would care to know my name,
Would care to feel my hurt.
Who am I?
That the bright and morning star,
Would choose to light the way,
For my ever wandering heart.

Not because of who I am,
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done,
But because of who you are.

I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,
And you've told me who I am.
I am yours.
I am yours.

Who am I?
That the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
And watch me rise again.
Who am I?
That the voice that calmed the sea,
Would call out through the rain,
And calm the storm in me.

Not because of who I am,
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done,
But because of who you are.


I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,
And you've told me who I am.
I am yours.

Not because of who I am,
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done,
But because of who you are.


I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,
And you've told me who I am.
I am yours.
I am yours.
I am yours.

Whom shall I fear
Whom shall I fear
Cause I am yours..
I am yours..