something's wrong but i dont know what.
>:(

Phil 3:7-9


7But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. 8What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ 9and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ—the righteousness that comes from God and is by faith.

Paul- a true disciple, dying to self but alive in Christ. his worry doesn't lie in being out of shape or not being able to gain favour from the people he meets, not about having the jackets and watches of his favourite brands, not about impressing girls or becoming rich, not about visiting his favourite holiday places. His mind is set on pleasing Christ and Christ alone, no matter how smooth sailing or rocky the journey turns out to be.

with regards to his ministry in Thessalonica: (1Thess 2)

2We had previously suffered and been insulted in Philippi, as you know, but with the help of our God we dared to tell you his gospel in spite of strong opposition. 3For the appeal we make does not spring from error or impure motives, nor are we trying to trick you. 4On the contrary, we speak as men approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel. We are not trying to please men but God, who tests our hearts. 5You know we never used flattery, nor did we put on a mask to cover up greed—God is our witness. 6We were not looking for praise from men, not from you or anyone else.

as what people call "second generation Christians", there is a danger of thinking we are Christians just because we attend church every Sunday. do we really believe in Christ as our Saviour who died for our sins and reconciling us to God our Father? what does being a Christian mean?

Luke 9
23Then he said to them all: "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. 24For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it. 25What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit his very self? 26If anyone is ashamed of me and my words, the Son of Man will be ashamed of him when he comes in his glory and in the glory of the Father and of the holy angels. 27I tell you the truth, some who are standing here will not taste death before they see the kingdom of God."

Ephesians 5
1Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children 2and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

do we even know who Jesus Christ is?

are we even TRYING to know who He is?

or are we just treating Him as our "divine Santa Claus" whom we just go to request for whatever we want or need, whenever we want?

welcome to the first week of 2010. the todo list is already neverending but now's the time to get working! no more bumming around!

SELF: regular QT catch up with people muay thai classes? jogging swimming call mrs toh buy presents/make cards burn sermons to cd summarise discipleship 1-2-1

OCF: read up on alpha reflection from convy prepare for LC meet think of returnees officer contact list for predep seminars ocf guild rego form

CURTIN: return to good standing template register for classes

ISAIAH 9



6 For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, [b] Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.
7 Of the increase of his government and peace there will be no end. He will reign on David's throne and over his kingdom, establishing and upholding it with justice and righteousness from that time on and forever. The zeal of the LORD Almighty will accomplish this.

it's been a pretty full on summer break ever since i landed in sunny/rainy singapore.. family time, meet ups, church, prayer buddy meetings, sisters day and then off to pj with michy hoe for a night then to klang for AGM and melaka for convy! back to singapore with barely enough time to unpack and pack and onto another flight to kota kinabalu, sabah!

absolutely amazing moments! and definitely, all glory to no one else but God alone (:

things i've learnt/experienced:

- lovely people who are so generous and ever ready to offer help and love and care. sometimes i dont want to be friends with such people because i always feel i cant give enough in return.. but they are really examples of unconditional love, like God's love for us and his efforts to reconcile us to him. i think the most i should do is just to pay it forward :))

- the amazingness of holiday prayer buddy meets :D got the privilege to catch up with minmin and yilin for a prayer buddy meet and i couldnt stop thinking what a great idea it is! holidays are usually dangerous days for my spiritual walk with God because everything else seems more exciting than reading the bible and praying. but God's making me realise what better things i can spend my time on in the holidays instead of mindless useless matters and i reallly thank God for that!

- i thank God for more courage and less fear of awkwardness when talking about God to my family, being able to read our daily bread with jodie :D

- i fell in love with a 3 month old husky called blitz! proudly owned by melody, mervyn, auntie and uncle cheebeng- the kind family that hosted kristi, steph and i during agm in port klang :D blitz has a butt of a kangaroo!

- AGM and convention which was a great learning experience once again, renewing my passion for overseas students ministry after rubbing shoulders with people who have had, or are working towards the same goal in other parts of australia.. young and old..

- i learnt from AGM the importance of our attitudes in ministry, the importance of follow up with returnees, being encouraged by other centre reports, TO TAKE THE TIME TO SEEK GOD'S FACE, to understand our generation in order to effectively reach out to them (: and that it takes time and effort to get to know people

- i learnt from convention that we are doing all things in the presence of God, to preach the gospel in and out of season, to commit our actions to God in prayer, like Nehemiah, importance of unity, to have hearts of thanksgiving, perseverance in faith!

- ocf thanksgiving gala night was great in many ways. being part of the dance team, cheah hooi taught us more than dance moves, but to commit all we are to God, remembering that we are dancing for God alone and no one else. that was one big lesson! cheah hooi's such a blessing! so lively even when she's pregnant. another thing was the encouragement i got from what ocf has done in the lives of many people from 1959 up to now and it motivates and compels me to want to give more to the ministry!

- kota kinabalu is my new favourite place, esp manukan island! i think i can be friends with the fishies.. it's so cool how they just swim up to you rather fearlessly just to get the bread from your hands. hide and seek with the clownfishes in the sea anemone was the best though :D they are the cutest things alive!!

these days, waiting for my school email inbox to load feels similar to sitting in the cinema watching a horror movie... the suspense and uncertainty of events about to unfold makes your heart thump faster and faster and almost knocks you out.

it kicks in when you first log into the school account and notice a new message in your inbox. "what can it be? results? a notice saying that you have failed your unit? a fine?" only expecting the worse and bracing yourself for the blow of terrible news, you CLICK and wait for the inbox to upload. it is this time where the theme music from Alfred Hitchcock's PSYCHO drills itself into your head. high-pitched, hair-raising and ear-piercing, it brings on the possibility of an anxiety attack as you wait... and wait.. and freak out and wait.. and because the internet's a bit slow, you wait some more.. and bits of the screen starts appearing, you start to feel its hard to breathe...

then the email appears.. sometimes it's relief, sometimes it's an anti-climax (like an email that's not school related), sometimes it is the worst case scenario as you've expected. but unlike during the horror movie where you scream and pass out at the sight of the monstrous creature, you just get on with it.

God's holding your hand and there's nothing that He can't handle. Nothing happens without God's permission and if God brings you to it, have faith that He will bring you through it. Maybe He has something installed for you in this phase of life. a purpose, a lesson, a time for His glory to be revealed. Not something you'd have expected, but this is just one of life's surprises, choose the way you'd want to respond to them. Thankful, humble and gracious, or devastated, depressed and hopeless?

+++ don't forget your real purpose on earth!

Matthew 28

16Then the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain where Jesus had told them to go. 17When they saw him, they worshiped him; but some doubted. 18Then Jesus came to them and said, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in[a] the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."

why get angry, mr grumpy?

it's total unneccessary nonsensical oversensitivity

God guide our minds

teach us love and forgiveness

teach us graciousness and humility

teach us to be quick to listen and slow to anger

teach us to be understanding and non-judgemental

Take my five loaves and two fishes

Do with it as you will, I surrender

Take my fears and inhibitions

All my burdens, my ambitions

You can use it all

I hope it's not too small

I trust in You, I trust in You

-five loaves and two fishes, Corrinne May

I think i'm ready to be a granny